


Since The Beginning

by Jyou_no_Sonoko



Category: Chilling Adventures of Sabrina (TV 2018)
Genre: Christian Mythology, Christianity, Gen, Hey Lilith victim blaming isn't a groovy thing, I've got a lot of these stored up but this didn't neatly pair with any others so here it is, In which Mary is both firm and soft, Myth of Eden, Reference to Spousal Abuse, We love some supportive empowering marith in an emotional hellscape, another teeny one, because she cares too much about Lilith to leave this be, marith, plz be kinder to your surviving self, reference to lucifer, short dialogue, short n solo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-20
Updated: 2020-11-20
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:01:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27643831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jyou_no_Sonoko/pseuds/Jyou_no_Sonoko
Summary: Mary returns home to a Lilith who had been disassociating, slipping in and out of ancient memory, for unknown hours, and the First Witch admits the doubts which have been assailing her from so long ago.Dialogue and audio link included.
Relationships: Mary Wardwell | Madam Satan | Lilith & Original Mary Wardwell, Mary Wardwell | Madam Satan | Lilith/Original Mary Wardwell
Comments: 4
Kudos: 12





	Since The Beginning

[ **Audio** ](https://drive.google.com/file/d/1aTtAkQAzOtbdMT2UaOrvEcxfyFxY9PMj/view?usp=sharing)

**Mary** : Lilith? I said 'I'm home', didn't you hear me?  
**Lilith** : Oh... No, I did not.  
**Mary** : How long have you been sitting there?  
**Lilith** : ...Where?  
**Mary** : There. In my chair. With the last of the cookies, I presume.  
**Lilith** : Since... the beginning of time.  
**Mary** : Oh don't be so dramatic.  
**Lilith** : ...  
**Mary** : Or...  
**Lilith** : ...  
**Mary** : Where were you, really? Your face says you haven't been here for a while.  
**Lilith** : I've just been going back and forth. From the Beginning.  
**Mary** : Oh.  
**Lilith** : And I can't stop wondering, whether perhaps I reacted too strongly.  
**Mary** : Too strongly? How so?  
**Lilith** : Well. Was it... could it really have been so terrible? To let the man alongside whom I had been moulded, do what he had been created to do with me?  
**Mary** : _To_ you.  
**Lilith** : Hm.  
**Mary** : So you're doubting your decision to leave.  
**Lilith** : Not for the first time. How could I not?  
**Mary** : You made a huge decision, but you thought it through. I know you did. You followed your instincts, and your heart.  
**Lilith** : I was... _green_.  
**Mary** : You were.  
**Lilith** : Maybe if I'd given myself more time, I could have grown used to the situation--  
**Mary** : No.  
**Lilith** : --And found the sort of happiness they both wanted me to. I mean, honestly. It's not as though either of them _intended_ for me to be miserable.  
**Mary** : Sometimes intention isn't enough.  
**Lilith** : ...  
**Mary** : Do you really think that living with that denial could have brought you happiness? If you were then the woman you are today--  
**Lilith** : I'd have slaughtered him the first time he tried to roll on top of me.  
**Mary** : That's not what I meant, Lilith.  
**Lilith** : ...  
**Mary** : I meant the sort of woman who is uncompromising, because she knows who she is and what she deserves.  
**Lilith** : Was I that girl?  
**Mary** : Well you must have come from somewhere. The _You_ sitting in front of me right now.  
**Lilith** : True. Though for someone who supposedly knew what she deserved, I did spend an awfully long time swallowing punishment. At the hands of a man.  
**Mary** : We're not talking about the Garden anymore, of course.  
**Lilith** : No.  
**Mary** : So then, you've moved on to questioning whether you're to blame? For Lucifer's...  
**Lilith** : ...  
**Mary** : Sorry. For _his_ abuse? Because we have a word for that now.  
**Lilith** : I'm aware. But, if we are logical about it, had I not been _quite_ so _green_ , I would not have thrown myself heart and soul at someone I had no   
ability to understand. Somebody who plummeted down from the sky, with wings aflame. What about that sight could have possibly caused me to think I should get involved?  
**Mary** : Loneliness? Compassion?  
**Lilith** : Oh Mary. Projecting again, I see.  
**Mary** : Deflecting again, Lilith?  
**Lilith** : Well, regardless, I made my own bed, and there was many a time where I might have gotten out of that bed. Even if the floor was, in fact, lava.  
**Mary** : So, what is it that we're blaming you for? Just so I can be clear. For wanting to protect yourself? Or for loving someone?  
**Lilith** : Charming how you always find a way to make me feel silly.  
**Mary** : I'm not trying to make you feel silly. You're doing that on your own.  
**Lilith** : Thank you.  
**Mary** : Don't mention it. But also, please, mention it. Every time this happens. Because I need you to know that this is... _human_. Everything you're feeling is human. Even if the circumstances aren't.  
**Lilith** : ...  
**Mary** : With everything that you've been through, I can't imagine that one single cycle of grieving would be enough.  
**Lilith** : So endless cycles, then.  
**Mary** : I hope not. Not if I can help it, anyway. I'm... rather hoping that there are points to break that cycle. Even if it starts to feel comfortable to stay in it.  
**Lilith:** You think this is _comfortable_ for me?  
**Mary** : Not in the same way as my chair or the hearth might be. But perhaps.  
**Lilith** : Then I must be very strange.  
**Mary** : You are. But... not like that. You're strange in ways that are beautiful.  
**Lilith** : Ha.  
**Mary** : You're a mystery. But you're also normal.  
**Lilith** : How _dare_ you.  
**Mary** : Oh, there you are. Do me a favour, won't you?  
**Lilith** : ...  
**Mary** : Stay there? Here. For a while at least. Because honestly, Lilith? I think I deserve your company far more than they do. 


End file.
